I'll be kind enough not to elaborate on the title of this post, other than to comment that I spend enough time on the crapper to be inspired in such ways.
But really, it's a sign of advancing years. I'm not as old as most of my blogger buddies, many of whom are dealing with more health issues than I (I'm not dealing with shit other than my shitty teeth).
For me, it's more the realization that things don't work like they used to. This year in particular, I've found my body not wanting to do what I want it to, be it an inconsistent sleep cycle or jumping/bouncing over shit. And then there's my stiff neck, the easily stirred bitch headaches, and the general lethargy. I had to struggle like fuck (and take off my blanket) to get up long enough to get the computer fired up.
Needless to say, this means I barely get shit done.
I've been scrolling through the channels since 11 o'clock. The networks are running commercials. The cable news channels suck ass. I'm reduced to watching some motherfucker jump a river or something at midnight on ESPN to usher in the new year. And considering I usually only stop briefly if at all, I'm nearly at the bottom of things to do on this night. A couple more years, it's bedtime at 10 (if the boy stops pissing the bed).
I suppose it's inevitable that this happens to people. I figure there's a point at which everyone hits their prime. I'm past that already, unless I get something in the world that puts the fire back in me. It gets to the point that I don't check the blogs, or the email, or any of that shit. In fact, my Gmail has 17 messages, my Yahoo mail (which tracks comments on my blogs) has 31 messages (although I might not have deleted anything in over a week), and my Hotmail has 24, half of which are junk (and sadly, there are probably even more in the junk mail filter). Hell, this is the first time today I've even been on the messenger.
In the end, I'm going to probably go to bed the first hour of the new year, because it's not like I have anything else to do. Of course, even if I did, I'd be struggling to find someone to watch the kids so I could do something. Instead, I'm just going to post this and try to get it linked on Facebook while it's still 2009 (I have a couple minutes).
Fuck, I'm feeling old....
Thursday, December 31, 2009
Tuesday, December 29, 2009
...getting back on track.
One thing that the holiday season tends to do is yank my world off the tracks, and it's in reaching the next year that I get things all steady and shit.
Like my car insurance. I get a cancellation notice, plan to pay it, but it gets lost in the paperwork, and I get the cancellation paper on Saturday (Merry fucking Christmas). To fix it, the paper and the website say I have to call my agent. So I call my agent on the way their direction with the expectation that I have to stop in and sign papers. But no, I have to call the insurance company directly to fix it (which I could have probably done before venturing out onto the shitty roads with a high potential for accidents had I known. But I ironed it out, although I'm still a couple of bucks off (as the website posted a different amount than what they wanted and I paid that).
Then there's the bank. I go to the ATM before Christmas, pull out $20. And when I open the mail Monday at lunch, that $20 overdrew me by $2, which cost me $30. And my paycheck deposited the next day. So the overdraft was legit, EXCEPT that the ATM let me overdraw. And this at a time when money is tightest.
But oh well. I did get my living room and the kids' bedroom cleaned, and the paper and cardboard from Christmas taken out and recycled by fire. I tried to do the plastic too, but it was putting out too much smoke that the snowstorm wouldn't disguise it. Yes, I was burning shit in a snowstorm. But the kids were away, so it all worked out.
But the worst of it is that the weather is not cooperating for me to be at my peak. I run slow when it's cold.
On Christmas Eve, we had snow. It rained and melted all the snow away for Christmas day, replacing it with freezing rain (and I had to get up early to work, go to my family's (and eat bloody delicious prime rib and shrimp cocktail (YUM-fucking-O!!!!!!!!!1!!!!! !)), got a bitch headache and fall asleep, then go back to work (although double time makes it worth it). So I sat inside and relaxed the following sunny Saturday, only to have it snow like a bastard on Sunday. Then it gets cold and icy and drifty on Monday. Shit.
And then it's off to work, where the phones were ringing hard for the most part (one ISP we service has multiple problems and no one checking emails or answering phones (leaving us to stutter for pissed off customers)). And that's on top of the usual cavalcade of the fucking dum.
Here's a hint: When you call in to tech support, we don't expect you to know shit. It's job security for us for you to not know shit. We do expect literacy. The ability to follow directions like "click on this" or "type this." The ability to answer simple questions with some degree of accuracy, like "What lights are lit?". If it's technical, then we'll do our best to work with the problem. But if we have you type an email address in and instead of using the "@" symbol you type "dumbmotherfuckeratlalaland.net.com" then you should bathe with your computer. At worst, your computer will fry. At best, you reduce your impact on the gene pool.
To illustrate:
Scary thing is that I've had calls this bad in reality....
Like my car insurance. I get a cancellation notice, plan to pay it, but it gets lost in the paperwork, and I get the cancellation paper on Saturday (Merry fucking Christmas). To fix it, the paper and the website say I have to call my agent. So I call my agent on the way their direction with the expectation that I have to stop in and sign papers. But no, I have to call the insurance company directly to fix it (which I could have probably done before venturing out onto the shitty roads with a high potential for accidents had I known. But I ironed it out, although I'm still a couple of bucks off (as the website posted a different amount than what they wanted and I paid that).
Then there's the bank. I go to the ATM before Christmas, pull out $20. And when I open the mail Monday at lunch, that $20 overdrew me by $2, which cost me $30. And my paycheck deposited the next day. So the overdraft was legit, EXCEPT that the ATM let me overdraw. And this at a time when money is tightest.
But oh well. I did get my living room and the kids' bedroom cleaned, and the paper and cardboard from Christmas taken out and recycled by fire. I tried to do the plastic too, but it was putting out too much smoke that the snowstorm wouldn't disguise it. Yes, I was burning shit in a snowstorm. But the kids were away, so it all worked out.
But the worst of it is that the weather is not cooperating for me to be at my peak. I run slow when it's cold.
On Christmas Eve, we had snow. It rained and melted all the snow away for Christmas day, replacing it with freezing rain (and I had to get up early to work, go to my family's (and eat bloody delicious prime rib and shrimp cocktail (YUM-fucking-O!!!!!!!!!1!!!!! !)), got a bitch headache and fall asleep, then go back to work (although double time makes it worth it). So I sat inside and relaxed the following sunny Saturday, only to have it snow like a bastard on Sunday. Then it gets cold and icy and drifty on Monday. Shit.
And then it's off to work, where the phones were ringing hard for the most part (one ISP we service has multiple problems and no one checking emails or answering phones (leaving us to stutter for pissed off customers)). And that's on top of the usual cavalcade of the fucking dum.
Here's a hint: When you call in to tech support, we don't expect you to know shit. It's job security for us for you to not know shit. We do expect literacy. The ability to follow directions like "click on this" or "type this." The ability to answer simple questions with some degree of accuracy, like "What lights are lit?". If it's technical, then we'll do our best to work with the problem. But if we have you type an email address in and instead of using the "@" symbol you type "dumbmotherfuckeratlalaland.net.com" then you should bathe with your computer. At worst, your computer will fry. At best, you reduce your impact on the gene pool.
To illustrate:
Scary thing is that I've had calls this bad in reality....
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